What is Anger?

Description: Anger is a normal, human emotion. What makes it a problem is when someone expresses anger inappropriately, such as by hurting themselves or others.
Objectives: Understanding Anger
Assessment: Read All, Q & A,  and complete Short Quiz
Resources: Lessons in units
Learning method: Reading, Reflections about the lessons and positive life skills forums (Anger, self-help, goal setting, etc.)

Everyone has likely experienced anger at some time or another. While certain people become furious more often than others and have regular, intense outbursts, others tend to bottle their feelings and then explode or erupt without warning.

Anger is a basic human emotion and a natural reaction to situations beyond our control. There are a number of things that can trigger or contribute to anger, such as the actions of another person (treating an animal unfairly), an event (favorite football team is beaten), stress (losing the new account at work), expectations not being met, feelings of hurt, disrespect, humiliation,
embarrassment, jealousy, and sadness.

Depending on how it is managed and expressed, anger can be positive or negative. It has positive consequences when angry feelings help you address a problem or issue with yourself or another person and rectify the situation.

Dealing with anger positively enables you to put negative emotions into perspective. When you want to release pent-up energy or feel frustrated or upset, there are constructive ways to channel your anger, like listening to music or going to the gym. These are often used in treating anger disorders.

However, expressing anger in a negative way often leads to various unhealthy behaviors such as violence and aggression. You may become out of control and threatening to others. When anger interferes with your ability to think or act such interferingly, this can cause you to invite unnecessary trouble to yourself. If anger hampers your personal relationships with friends and family, leads to violence, creates trouble in your professional life, or makes people fear your temper, you may be suffering from anger disorders, and treating anger becomes essential.

Depending on how it is managed and expressed, anger can be positive or negative. It has positive consequences when intense feelings help you address a problem or issue with yourself or another person and rectify the situation.

Dealing with anger positively enables you to put negative emotions into perspective. When you want to release pent-up energy or feel frustrated or upset, there are constructive ways to channel your anger, like listening to music or going to the gym. These are often used in treating anger disorders.

However, expressing anger in a negative way often leads to various unhealthy behaviors such as violence and aggression. You may become out of control and threatening to others. When anger interferes with your ability to think or act clearly, the emotion can cause you to invite unnecessary trouble for yourself. If anger hampers your personal relationships with friends and family, leads to violence, creates trouble in your professional life, or makes people fear your temper, you may be suffering from anger disorders, and treating anger becomes essential.

FAQ

1. I shouldn’t “hold in” my anger. It’s healthy to vent and let it out.

Anger is not something you have to “let out” in an aggressive way to avoid blowing up. In fact, outbursts and tirades only make your anger problem worse.

2. Anger, aggression, and intimidation help me earn respect and obtain what I want.

True power doesn’t come from bullying others. People may be afraid of you, but they will respect you if you control yourself and handle opposing viewpoints. Others will listen and accommodate your needs if you communicate respectfully.

3. I can’t help myself. Anger isn’t something you can control.

You can’t always control the situation you’re in or how it makes you feel, but you can control how you express your anger. And you can express your anger without being verbally or physically abusive. Even if someone is trying to provoke you, you always have a choice about how to respond.

4. Anger management is about learning to suppress your anger.

Never getting furious is not a good goal. Anger is normal, and it will come out regardless of how hard you try to suppress it. Anger management is all about becoming aware of your underlying feelings and needs and developing healthier ways to manage upset. Rather than trying to suppress your anger, the goal is to express it in constructive ways.